Growing Through It
A friendship is like any other relationship where effective communication is imperative to it’s success. In one of the recent episodes of Insecure, we see how major life changes coupled with the lack of or poor communication can put a strain on a friendship.
I’ve concluded that in a few of my friendships over the last year, the weird spaces that we found ourselves in were because one or both of us were experiencing major life changes that ended up shifting the dynamic of the relationship. Unspoken feelings, assumed intentions, misspeaking and more lead to the breakdown in these relationships.
In other friendships, it was a lot of ego. On both sides. Waiting for the other person to apologize, take accountability or simply start the conversation. This rarely speeds up the process to getting back on track.
With maturity, a willingness to salvage the friendship some bonds have been mended. With others… I have yet to be the bigger person so they are still in their own purgatory.
In going forward, to be honest, I can not say what my conflict resolution style would be like when it comes to these moments with friends. Each relationship is different & each road to a rough path is different as well.
In Insecure the characters Tiffany and Kelli have only just begun to scratch the surface in confronting and addressing their feelings to not only one another but to their friend group. Naturally, it made me reflect. I do owe it to the friendships to communicate my side and hear the other person out. However, I’ve been learning more that sometimes breaks are needed to grow and then reunite as we see fit, if the relationship warrants that.
The year is not over yet. There’s more than enough time for me to make peace with these rough patches one way or another.
(Long story short( What has been some rough patches with one (or some) of your closest friends?
Were things mended? If so, how?
IF you could go back and change how you handled a rough patch in your friendship, what would you do differently?
What is one of the biggest lessons that you’ve learned from falling out with a friend?